Sexual Identity

It
shouldn’t matter to anyone but yourself. The whole stigma surrounding
sexual orientation is really tiring, I mean why should it matter. What
you do when you’re alone with your partner of the same or opposite sex
shouldn’t concern anyone. So why does it? Why do people constantly
inject themselves into others personal lives? Especially when they’re
not invited. Labels can be good sometimes, but why must the be public
unless it’s necessary? Of course if you have an interest in someone you
want to make sure they like your gender, right? You don’t want to waste
your time or look foolish. Other than that people shouldn’t care about
what your orientation is, its not like it’s affecting them. 

The reason I’m telling you this is because today I viewed a play about a white kid in high school that is gay and is getting bullied because of it, and is pushed to the point of suicide. Of course you feel sympathetic, no one should be pushed so far as to take their own life. The only problem I had was, I thought I’ve heard this story before. Many times. I mean for such a pressing issue as homophobia, it’s odd that we hear the same story over again. Where the white gay kid has to overcome the bullies at school and fear that his accepting parents might find out, and in the end realize that the world was much bigger than high school and none of what happens here matters because it doesn’t define him. What about the many other stories? The hundreds of unheard stories? The one about the black kid that realizes he’s gay and is kicked on to the street because of who he is, and dares not even mention it at school. The one where the Asian dad with a family of four pretends to be someone he’s not? Or what about the one where the Muslim girl has to bottle in how she feels about her sexuality or is nervous to experiment because of the shame she might bring upon her family? Why can’t we hear stories like that. Why must we suffer through the same stereotype over and over. The flamboyant gay kid. Gay doesn’t mean flamboyant, although the media would have you believe otherwise. Not everyone who is homosexual and male is flamboyant and not everyone who is homosexual and female is brute and tough. These stereotypes are what bring homophobia into society, not get rid of it. How are we supposed to get people to accept us when we only see ourselves a certain way. We erase every other type of gay person, and all we’re left with is the flamboyant white gay. Maybe if we showed people that there is more to homosexuals than just stereotypes they will start to see us more as humans and less as an alien species. It honestly shouldn’t be that big of a deal, the only difference between liking the same gender as opposed to the opposite is the way that we have sex. And honestly what someone does in the bedroom shouldn’t concern you. Everyone has a right to a private life and it’s not affecting yours negatively in any way. Obviously I’m not saying that queer people should be invisible. But we shouldn’t have to feel like we have giant targets on our backs. The first step in doing that is eliminating the heteronormative hierarchy. Without the assumption that everyone is straight we will have less fear and confusion about what being gay is. People will be treated equally and won’t have to worry about being discriminated against.

Jakob Gillis